Smart (Ass) Phone
It’s official. My new phone is smarter than me. And I didn’t even get an actual smart phone, just one of those basic phones that makes calls and enables you to text. But I upgraded from my ancient LG flip phone that I’ve had for years and now I have a bright, shiny touch-screen phone, complete with slide out Qwerty keyboard. So far, I.hate.it.
Put me in front of a laptop or any computer and my fingers make rapid-fire music across the keyboard. I can key like crazy. But this phone stops me dead in my tracks. My fingers suddenly become bumbling and clumsy on the touch screen and words get misspelled, texts get sent before they are completed. I give up and try the Qwerty keyboard, first pecking painfully with my index finger. “No, no, use your thumbs!!” my editor admonishes me. I like that idea; with my old phone I could make calls and text like crazy with my thumb.
For some reason that old dexterity doesn’t translate with this new device. I find myself squinting at the small keys, searching for the right one to press. Frustrated, I abandon the task of texting and set about exploring Ringtones.
Wait, no “Doorbell”???? I MUST have the “Doorbell” ringtone! I have one person, and one person only, who is designated that ringtone. I know I sound like a die-hard romantic but for me it signifies the sound of my suitor calling, showing up at my door and ringing the bell.
I Google free ringtones online—download a “doorbell” ringtone, problem solved! Ok, I’m getting the hang of this. The new phone might be fun.
And I have to admit, phone calls sound clear-as-a-bell on the new phone. And the nifty camera that came with it takes pretty interesting pictures — you can even use cool effects like changing your picture to black and white. I figure all this out while I’m at work, supposedly w-o-r-k-i-n-g. I practice taking arty shots of my coffee cup, of my laptop, of my phone, then sending them to my editor. Neato.
Oops. Conference call coming up in 20 minutes. Time to put my intriguing new toy away. Maybe it’s not such a bad phone after all…